When we think of ego, we often think about the characteristics of people who see themselves as more or better than others, like arrogance, selfishness, pride or self-importance. But the truth is that the opposite qualities are also based on ego.
And with opposite qualities I mean thinking yourself unworthy, unimportant or unlovable. In other words, thinking too negative about yourself as opposed to thinking overly positive about yourself. They are on the opposite side of a scale and are both a result of how we think about ourselves, rather than based on just being who we are.
Often, traits like modesty and compassion are seen as the opposites of the self-importance aspects of our egos, but I think these are elements that are in the middle of the scale, rather than on the other side of it. They come to us naturally when we find a state of balance.
To find that balance, those on opposite sides of the scale require a different approach. And those approaches must at first be indirect, rather than direct. They who think themselves high and mighty will not be able to think of themselves less. The answer is to start thinking of others as more. This will eventually balance things out on their way to become equal.
The opposite can be done by they who consider themselves tiny at best. It’s likely the result of thinking of others as being more. So thinking of them as being less will in time establish a more balanced view. Mind you, thinking less of others in this way is not about being higher than them, but about getting them off of the pedestals and on the same level.
Once a state of equality is reached in our minds, thinking ourselves more or less important will fade and eventually disappear altogether. That’s when we can just be who we are, without judging ourselves in relation to others or others in relation to ourselves.
|Jerry CorstensA visionary dreamer with a blind passion for self-reflection and contemplating life, a self-proclaimed philosopher with poetic ambitions. He’s serious about helping people with the insights he gathered, but playful in the way he communicates his wisdom. It made him leave a career as environmental engineer behind, in favor of becoming a personal development coach and thought-provoking writer.|