Vicious circles are sometimes just circles, but sometimes they are like snowballs becoming bigger and bigger as they roll down the slopes of time. What once started as an incident between a few people can, down the line, cause whole generations to be stuck in patterns they would not have chosen to be in.
One of those vicious circles may well be the cause of us all playing roles that don’t do our authentic selves justice. In an emotionally unsafe environment our first line of defense is to put on a metaphorical mask; we start to act differently from how we would wish to in an attempt not to get hurt. The easy choice is to play along, rather than to stand strong.
But it’s actually the fact that we put on masks that makes the atmosphere we live in emotionally unsafe. It’s a nasty self-fulfilling prophecy. We hold each other in an iron grip that deep inside nobody really wants. We grew into it, slowly and gradually as we snowballed through the ages.
We started to put on disguises to fit into groups and to be popular, we changed character to follow bureaucratic instructions or to fulfill contractual obligation and we impersonated other peoples facades to get what they made us feel we were missing out on. It’s all pretense and it’s not going to make us happy.
Being who we really are is the only thing that can give us true bliss. And in order to succeed in being ourselves we have to take off the masks we wear, which make this world darker than it needs to be. We have to dare to be ourselves again, no matter the consequence. In the short term this may cause some upheaval in our lives, but in the long run it will bring us peace of mind and new found tranquility.
And in response, the more people who open up the more we transform our world into a place where we won’t feel the need to betray ourselves anymore; a world where we can all wear our true faces.
|Jerry CorstensA visionary dreamer with a blind passion for self-reflection and contemplating life, a self-proclaimed philosopher with poetic ambitions. He’s serious about helping people with the insights he gathered, but playful in the way he communicates his wisdom. It made him leave a career as environmental engineer behind, in favor of becoming a personal development coach and thought-provoking writer.|